This post is supposed to be due yesterday but from my fuzzy memory, “do not procrastinate” has always been one of my New Year resolutions and apparently, it will continue to be.

Exactly a year ago I was deciding on new resolutions, feeling excited about having ORDed, looking forward to being able to go back to studying after 2 boring and miserable years of NS and dreaming about great stuff that could possibly happen during the year. Well, 2008 turned out to be a hell of a year and one filled with much craziness, such as ridiculous crap which I never thought exist, as well as many great things I could only dream of previously. But in a way, I’m really glad things, even the bad ones, turned out the way they did. I’ve also met many awesome people in NUS who have changed my perspectives on many things. Also, after countless attempts, I finally got NUS to relent and approve my transfer to Science (although it came with a little twist and I really have to thank a certain professor for everything). Of course, getting in is only the beginning and it is no time to be arrogant and let my head swell for these joys could possibly be ephemeral.

Anyway, despite all the crap that has happened and the times when I’ve felt hopeless, 08 has been a great year for me on many levels and hopefully for many others as well and I’m sure 09 will be as well. Of course, with greatness come many other things as well but ultimately, I truly believe it is how you perceive and make use of the experiences that decides whether things will turn out to be as great as you wish they would be. I’ve been told that I’m overly optimistic sometimes but oh well, I probably am but at least it’s contagious.

This might possibly be my last post here as I’m getting sick of the green layout and I haven’t decided what to do to the blog yet but well, I’ll have to see how it goes.

Happy New Year and I hope 2009 will be a year filled with things to look forward to for everyone and if they don't exist, create them. Forgive the optimism but the occasional dose of it can’t hurt, can it? Have fun.

Goodbye 2008.

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When I was a little younger, and a little more naive(not that I'm not now), I was ever so convinced by those nicely packed phrases that come with ribbons in a fantastically looking box. Wow, they look like christmas presents, so lovely and so definitely true. And in one of the countless number of pretty boxes lay this certain phrase/sentence.

"If you fail to plan, you plan to fail."

So short, yet so powerful. Before you know it, you are an avid subscriber to this fantastic phrase and then one day, things don't follow the plan. In comes chaos and you're thinking why in the world did you start planning anyway.

Actually, the phrase is right. IF you don't plan, you are going to fail. It didn't promise you success or fame or fortune. However, with their most obvious indication, I'll have to disagree. If you don't plan, are you really going to fail? Well, I don't know what the "plan" here means exactly, it can be quite ambiguous but in my sense of the word, it meant to work out very detailedly everything and everything else. Do you really have to plan in such detail? Okay, step 1 blah blah blah. At this moment I'm going to be dealing with this problem whatsoever so let's solve a problem before it even happens. Why?

I'm not a cynic of every phrase that comes out from lovely packaged boxes. In fact there are many phrases that I do like. But, instead of the lovely boxes, I like those with a dash of reality and a whole lot of thorns. That phrase above, yes it is nice, but it would also be something a salesman would love. Nothing bad about it, at all, and now I just need to come along and sell you a whole world of stuff to help you plan your route to success. Money, yes. Success, maybe not.

If there's one thing I believe in, it is faith. I believe, you don't have to map out your life in such detail. The thing you should have, is a goal. I don't view having a goal as a plan; I view it as having something to work towards. Along the way you stumble and fall and get up and run and walk and breathe and sweat and cry. You make mistakes and you learn from it. Everything else between you and your goal are obstacles. It is up to YOU, your own determination, belief and faith to carry you through the tribulations and trials, not some carefully worked out plan.

You never know what's going to hit you. Just move along and whack them back just as hard as the problems hit you in the face. Who said life was easy. Oh yeah, about phrases, I do remember one, it's by the joker, whole thing is awesome but the part is when he talks to Dent.



Out.

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Two days ago, I went for the final Genes & Society lecture and somehow lectures seem to be more interesting towards the end of the semester. And in fact, this lecture changed some of my opinions in interesting ways. The lecture was about ethics and implications of developments in biotechnology and this particular scenario was raised: There is this fatal disease that is genetic in nature and if you carry the mutation, you will die by 30-40 and of course, to make things interesting, there is no cure with current medicine. However, we have the technology to sequence your genes to determine whether you carry this mutation. If you do, you will die. The question is would you do it?

Having a particular appetite for ethical questions regarding science, I immediately said to myself, “Sure, even if it’s incurable, the person can at least make full use of whatever time he or she has left and live a fuller life.”

I was dumbfounded by the professor’s reply. “Why do you need to know that before you can live a fuller life?” he asked.

Damn. He was right. Why didn’t I think of that? It was so obvious.

That somehow made me question whether diseases, or the lack thereof, are indeed convenient excuses and justifications given for not making full use of our lives. What difference should it make, whether we have some terminal disease or not, when it comes to deciding how we live our lives? Logically speaking, it shouldn’t make any difference but despite that, I instinctively fell into the trap of thinking that it should.

The experience was a refreshing one and it somehow reminded me of my priorities. Things seldom change my opinions but the professor's little statement did exactly that, in a good way.

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For as long as I can remember, I have loved December. It's the month of much desired school holiday back then when I was in school, it's the month of Christmas, although it doesn't mean much being in a furnace like here, and of course it's the last month of the year; which means people get to make a brand new set of ambitious new year resolutions... that is probably pretty similar to the last one they had. But isn't that the whole point of resolutions--to forget you made them, at least until it's time to make them again.

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its been a horrendous two weeks. everything seems to be shrouded by a perpetual(yet oh-so temporary) blanket of false happiness.

on the surface, the smiles and laughter are there, and others imagine genuine joy radiating through every particle of the body... the truth, so much darker.

deepest concerns and worries stay hidden, locked away, protected by a protective shell. one so thick and impregnable even your closest friends have given up trying to break through.

you appear strong and tough, jaw squared and ready to face the world. the lights, once turned off, however, you let everything out; the emotions, their turmoil, everything is whirling inside your very being. questions of who you really are haunt you, taunt you. who're you? who am i?

sometimes, when you're lucky, you manage to fade away in your sleep, and enter the other dimension. the dimension where everything and anything seem possible - the realm of dreams.

carefree lighthearted and bursting with joy
elves hiding in mystical forests you chase
hoping for a blessing of magical water
you bask in its sheer beauty of freedom

the beautiful-er world you try to grasp on
shattered to a thousand smithereens
by
the resonance of your bedroom alarm

as it jerks you unceremoniously from the other world.

really, who were you yesterday? who are you today? and who'll you be tomorrow?
solve these before you tackle anything else, derek.

bye'

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I truly believe, the best and surest way of looking into a person's life is through his everyday action and daily speech. And of course, by the day to day way of communications and body language, you can sometimes tell what somebody is like. In this age of technology and internet and I-pods, msn conversations are commonplace, at least in my heart, and in the hearts of the truest-bluest judesgoo-er. Actions speaks louder than words and copy-and-paste from conversation beats description whichever way you look at it. Here goes, judesgoo-ers at their best....


rek says:
just say wadeva u please later lol
jude says:
tier one 30 pop fiends dk rod
jude says:
tech to tier 2
jude says:
get slaughter, 2 statues, 1 lich, burrow on fiends
rek says:
unicorns have horns
jude says:
armour upgrade...tech tier 3 for destroys
rek says:
cows have milk ducts and udders
rek says:
and 4 stomachs!
jude says:
cats have whiskers!!! and they are jealous of the little snowball!
rek says:
elves have pointy ears and they look at humans timidly, scampering in patches of green in forests
jude says:
do u have any ideas how to catch elves? arthas is on a mission to destroy the elves, we need to preserve them
rek says:
i will preserve them, single handedly
jude says:
oh where, how? arthas is all powerful, and now he's the lich king. how can u do it? are u archimonde?
jude says:
but archimonde is dead...
rek says:
i can uninstall warcraft and the frozen throne and let them scorch in the everlasting sunshine in neverland
jude says:
but u did that once, and the lure of the lich king was too great, far too great for his alluring magic made you reinstall the game itself
jude says:
it's a vicious cycle
jude says:
the elves, poor elves, are doomed
jude says:
seriously this deserves to go on judesgoo
rek says:
well i can keep on doing that my entire life, as long as it delays their destruction, till i find an everlasting solution to be an epic of salvation for the cutest elves who have graced the sweet earth of our world with their tiny petite feet
jude says:
judesgoo-ed

I love this, it's obvious.

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